Our every thought, word, move counts
9th January 2012 · 0 Comments
By Fr. Jerome LeDoux
Contributing Columnist
Our Mother of Mercy Church member Kevin Youman knew that his mother Shirley was not in the best of health, but he was unaware that her end time was to come so quickly with Christmas just several days away. As to anyone who has lost a relative around Christmas time, the timing seems to be a cruel twist of irony, almost mockery in the face of near universal merriment.
So bad was the timing that the Youman family’s decision was to schedule the Mass of Resurrection and funeral on Christmas Eve at St. Edward Church in New Iberia, Louisiana. The unacceptable alternative would have been to prolong grief by scheduling the funeral the following week. That made for a very tough, heavy drive from Fort Worth, Texas to Bayou Teche country.
Almost at the identical time, I received a December 21 email from Janna Avalon, editor of The Mississippi Catholic, the official press organ of the Diocese of Natchez-Jackson, saying that her mother had died Wednesday, December 16. Never far from any of us, the anniversary syndrome or holiday blues had come into the picture again, inserting themselves into our perennial grief cycle.
Hardly had the heavy news about the two deceased mothers come to our attention when Mike Barks received word that his brother, Leonard Barks, Jr., had gone to God in Portsmouth, Virginia. Mike and his wife Marie had just returned from Leonard’s bedside there. Back in Fort Worth, they could only wonder whether Leonard would survive this emotional season of Holy Days.
I frequently say that we, the living, only think that we make the schedules for our daily tasks and activities. Actually, the dead make our schedules, bending our time to match their homegoing. The same thing had happened almost exactly one year ago when Lelia Ware, mother of Our Mother of Mercy Church drummer Floyd Ware, was called home by her heavenly Father.
Once more, the sheer urgency and importance of our life at any given moment had asserted themselves in the most convincing manner possible during Christmas preparations. How prophetic we are at those times when we say, “I haven’t a moment to lose!” Truth to tell, we never have a moment to lose, no matter what our age, condition of health, or importance of a chore at hand.
Even when we think we do, we never have a moment to waste, let alone to kill, as some folks say while seeking a pastime literally to try to make time pass more quickly. Such people, who have not learned the meaningfulness of life, will discover it to their utter grief when times slips away for them or some beloved relatives or friends. “You don’t miss your water till your well runs dry.”
Reflecting on the loss of precious ones at this time of the year, our first realization must be that we cannot afford to wait until our well of life runs dry. The “water” referred to, of course, is our relatives and other dear ones whose presence waters and cultivates our life and love. Do not delay your esteem and appreciation until you see the relationships of your life quickly slipping away.
Stephen Grellet (1773-1855), French-born Quaker Minister, spoke powerfully about seizing upon each moment, “I expect to pass through this world but once. Any good thing, therefore, that I can do or any kindness I can show to any fellow human being let me do it now. Let me not defer nor neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.”
We plainly don’t have time to waste our thoughts. The process of abstraction and its awesome capabilities and wonder are not a phenomenon to be wasted. There is a great urgency about developing and enjoying to the full the wondrous gift of reasoning.
Given birth by our thoughts, our words also bear an urgency about them. Think how often you hear someone say, “If I could talk with my mother just one more time!”
Our actions, naturally, are the final urgency of living our lives to the full at all times.
“Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice. But for those who love, time is not,” said Henry Van Dyke, implying that, no matter how you view it, time is priceless, irreplaceable and irretrievable.
Dr. Benjamin E. Mays once said, “I have only just a minute, only sixty seconds in it, forced upon me, can’t refuse it, didn’t seek it, didn’t choose it. But, it is up to me to use it. I must suffer if I lose it. Give account if I abuse it, just a tiny little minute — but eternity is in it.”
Yes, there is urgency in our life every day, every hour, every minute. We have but one go-around to get it right, make it meaningful and fulfill our purpose for being here on this planet.
This article was originally published in the January 9, 2012 print edition of The Louisiana Weekly newspaper